nascar nice car joke

Motorsport drivers do not eat before a race, so they do not get Indy-gestion. What do Nascar and a Kinkos dumpster have in common? What happened when the French vehicle sponsored by the Brie manufacturers got wrecked? Not bad, although as someone who has played their fair share of soccer I think you might be underestimating the size of a school bus or overestimating the size of a soccer goal. So the turns are all right all right all right. What does NASCAR stand for? The number of times you get hit in a dirt track pileup is directly proportional to the number of times you said, " Everything will be okay today". Sorry, this post was deleted by the person who originally posted it. A: Hollywood is calling and wants him to co-star in a sequel to "Speed Racer" I think its important to keep the races separate. Setup Size: 8.9 GB. Why cant motorcycles do push-ups?Because theyre always two-tired. Out jump two of his pit crew members in trench coats, who walk to the rear of the vehicle where they stand facing oncoming traffic and begin opening their coats and exposing themselves to approaching drivers while another two get out of the back seat and begin checking the car. A friend told me he likes NASCAR more than Formula 1 There's an old saying in NASCAR racing This article is not just a compilation of some of the funniest race car jokes for car guys but also a source of laughter for any sports lover hungry for a chuckle. Matt Kenseth's car breaks down on the Interstate, so "9:12" eases over onto the shoulder. asks The Rainbow Warrior, "Isn't there any one here who can give me an example of a tragedy?" Why do conservatives hate the NASCAR subreddit? Kyle Busch was looking to find a woman so Dale Earnhardt Jr decided to help him out. (Closed), I Create Functional And Decorative Art On Functional Items That People Can Use Every Day, And Here Are My Newest 23 Works, Hey Pandas, What Are Your Most Useful Travel Tips? When I wrecked my last car, I solved the mystery of whether or not a Mercedes bends. Q: What is the worst thing about 5 Jeff Gordon Fans going over a cliff in a Monte Carlo? Cars theyre a pain to buy, cost you tons in repairs, and constantly put you in danger. What does the GT stand for on a Ford?Glued together. The last guy was able to get out of the way. They wave the Finnish flag at the end of the Grand Prix. Why do rednecks like to do it doggie style? A: When he taps you on the shoulder and asks Are we watching qualifying?, 15. A: Their personalities. Slowly, more and more people gather to watch them at work. And the priest said, "I agree with you completely. Q: Whats the hardest thing about trying to become the first woman to win the Daytona 500? Thinking Nonetheless, considering you ended up clicking on this article, we assume you are either of the two (or both): someone with a driving license or a big gearhead. It was quite a traffic jam. What kind of car does Jesus drive?A Christler. ._3Z6MIaeww5ZxzFqWHAEUxa{margin-top:8px}._3Z6MIaeww5ZxzFqWHAEUxa ._3EpRuHW1VpLFcj-lugsvP_{color:inherit}._3Z6MIaeww5ZxzFqWHAEUxa svg._31U86fGhtxsxdGmOUf3KOM{color:inherit;fill:inherit;padding-right:8px}._3Z6MIaeww5ZxzFqWHAEUxa ._2mk9m3mkUAeEGtGQLNCVsJ{font-family:Noto Sans,Arial,sans-serif;font-size:14px;font-weight:400;line-height:18px;color:inherit} 59. Delighted, Dale Earnhardt, taking in the sight of this beautiful piece of Automaking Delight, Shiney and powerful this car is made to run like hell. Cargo. "Will there be anything else?" What did the tornado say to the car?Want to go for a spin? A: Yeah, when they are getting tired. They're all racists. A short while later she left and the "Lowe's" Racer ordered another drink . A car part will never break down during a practise session, only during the event. He sits down and asks how Dale Earnhardt Jr is doing. What is the least favourite meal for drivers? A: Non-Athletic Sport Centered Around Rednecks. "Mph.". 22. A: He Loves Getting Slammed In The Rear. The mechanic says, "Good trade, sir." 4 car, is celebrating dad jokes like never before. Knock, knock! What should you double check when buying an electric car? The second boy says, "I'd like a 4 wheeler so I can Go out mudbogging out behind my house" Gordon says, "I'll get you the best Four Wheeler With all the safety Features and I'll have someone teach you how to drive it safely." A girl raises her hand. 16. Knock, knock! 54. Cars rip by at 200mph, so how fast do you have to be a NASCAR cameraman? Let us know what you think! ._2FKpII1jz0h6xCAw1kQAvS{background-color:#fff;box-shadow:0 0 0 1px rgba(0,0,0,.1),0 2px 3px 0 rgba(0,0,0,.2);transition:left .15s linear;border-radius:57%;width:57%}._2FKpII1jz0h6xCAw1kQAvS:after{content:"";padding-top:100%;display:block}._2e2g485kpErHhJQUiyvvC2{-ms-flex-align:center;align-items:center;display:-ms-flexbox;display:flex;-ms-flex-pack:start;justify-content:flex-start;background-color:var(--newCommunityTheme-navIconFaded10);border:2px solid transparent;border-radius:100px;cursor:pointer;position:relative;width:35px;transition:border-color .15s linear,background-color .15s linear}._2e2g485kpErHhJQUiyvvC2._3kUvbpMbR21zJBboDdBH7D{background-color:var(--newRedditTheme-navIconFaded10)}._2e2g485kpErHhJQUiyvvC2._3kUvbpMbR21zJBboDdBH7D._1L5kUnhRYhUJ4TkMbOTKkI{background-color:var(--newRedditTheme-active)}._2e2g485kpErHhJQUiyvvC2._3kUvbpMbR21zJBboDdBH7D._1L5kUnhRYhUJ4TkMbOTKkI._3clF3xRMqSWmoBQpXv8U5z{background-color:var(--newRedditTheme-buttonAlpha10)}._2e2g485kpErHhJQUiyvvC2._1asGWL2_XadHoBuUlNArOq{border-width:2.25px;height:24px;width:37.5px}._2e2g485kpErHhJQUiyvvC2._1asGWL2_XadHoBuUlNArOq ._2FKpII1jz0h6xCAw1kQAvS{height:19.5px;width:19.5px}._2e2g485kpErHhJQUiyvvC2._1hku5xiXsbqzLmszstPyR3{border-width:3px;height:32px;width:50px}._2e2g485kpErHhJQUiyvvC2._1hku5xiXsbqzLmszstPyR3 ._2FKpII1jz0h6xCAw1kQAvS{height:26px;width:26px}._2e2g485kpErHhJQUiyvvC2._10hZCcuqkss2sf5UbBMCSD{border-width:3.75px;height:40px;width:62.5px}._2e2g485kpErHhJQUiyvvC2._10hZCcuqkss2sf5UbBMCSD ._2FKpII1jz0h6xCAw1kQAvS{height:32.5px;width:32.5px}._2e2g485kpErHhJQUiyvvC2._1fCdbQCDv6tiX242k80-LO{border-width:4.5px;height:48px;width:75px}._2e2g485kpErHhJQUiyvvC2._1fCdbQCDv6tiX242k80-LO ._2FKpII1jz0h6xCAw1kQAvS{height:39px;width:39px}._2e2g485kpErHhJQUiyvvC2._2Jp5Pv4tgpAsTcnUzTsXgO{border-width:5.25px;height:56px;width:87.5px}._2e2g485kpErHhJQUiyvvC2._2Jp5Pv4tgpAsTcnUzTsXgO ._2FKpII1jz0h6xCAw1kQAvS{height:45.5px;width:45.5px}._2e2g485kpErHhJQUiyvvC2._1L5kUnhRYhUJ4TkMbOTKkI{-ms-flex-pack:end;justify-content:flex-end;background-color:var(--newCommunityTheme-active)}._2e2g485kpErHhJQUiyvvC2._3clF3xRMqSWmoBQpXv8U5z{cursor:default}._2e2g485kpErHhJQUiyvvC2._3clF3xRMqSWmoBQpXv8U5z ._2FKpII1jz0h6xCAw1kQAvS{box-shadow:none}._2e2g485kpErHhJQUiyvvC2._1L5kUnhRYhUJ4TkMbOTKkI._3clF3xRMqSWmoBQpXv8U5z{background-color:var(--newCommunityTheme-buttonAlpha10)} 29. . So I called him a racist. Q: What is Kevin Harvick's favorite color? Id be a terrible NASCAR driver because Im always right. Kids, I bought the cat a new car.Its a Cat-illac. One advertises there sponspors and the other keeps it hidden! 1. Compatibility Mechanical: 64 Bit (x64) And can you tell me WHY that would be a tragedy?" A: So They Can Both Watch The Race 60. Q: What do you call 1,000 Restrictor plates at the bottom of the ocean? because no-one else would be able to ketchup. None - they took the wheels off their homes years ago. Autosports provide some of the most thrilling jobs in the world, but the fast-paced nature of competitive driving, coupled with the physical and mental demands, can cause a strain on its drivers. That way they can **BOTH** watch NASCAR. NASCAR F*ck NASCAR! What do you call a VW bus at the top of a hill? Whats the difference between politicians and nascar drivers? That way they can **BOTH** watch NASCAR. Mechanic A Mechanic is standing outside the garage as Roger Penske is coming in to check out the new Taurus, and can't help but notice that Mr. Penske has a Dog under each arm. Why did the cop pull over the U-Haul truck? Two thirds of Americans worry about cybercriminals tracking them online, OnMail Offers New Inbox Break to Restore Work-Life Balance & Combat Email Fatigue, These five tips can help you rejuvenate your Zoom call with friends, 80 Boston Women-Owned Restaurants Receive Grants Totaling $400,000, TheLines.com: Packers, Chiefs Super Bowl favorites ahead of Wild Card Weekend. Oh, and that is at zero RPM. 9. Whats the difference between a Fiat and a golf ball?You can drive a golf ball more than 200 yards. When I wrecked my last car, I solved the mystery of whether or not a Mercedes bends. Q: If Robert Pressley, John Andretti and Geoff Bodine were in a boat and the Boat Sinks, Who Would be saved? What happens to fans if they run behind a dragster? What is a cars preferred mobile phone brand?No-Kia. Although dad jokes are told with the most genuine humorous intention, they are often unamusing except to the 'dad'. The first was the idea that Carl Edwards was returning in a fourth Team Penske car. I think it's important to keep the races separate. They were a little confused at their present situation, and they were startled to see a door in the wall open, behind the door was perhaps the ugliest 1973 Pinto they had ever seen. Whats the difference between a Ferrari and six trash bags full of recyclable cans? why aren't hotdog ads allowed in nascar? Thats not a leakMy car just marking its territory. It always takes a left turn. Small Town What does he do if Earnhardt Jr wins?" The human race! A: Caution Flag Yellow, 57. Kids may not know how to drive, but that doesnt stop them from loving cars any less. What do Michigan autoworkers do on Cinco de Mayo? How can you tell if a car is from Switzerland?It remains in neutral. Non Athletic Sports Centered Around Rednecks, 16. A: A true restrictor plate ''Lauda.'' Q: Why Is Tony Stewart Always In The Lead? The first was the idea that Carl Edwards was returning in a fourth Team Penske car. Guy walks into an auto parts store and says to the counterman Id like new air freshener for my Yugo. The guy behind the counter shakes his hand and says OK, that sounds like a pretty decent trade.. They get exhaust-ed. Which sport has ten letters and starts with G-A-S? Have a look at the top 10 funniest race car jokes for fans. Create an account to follow your favorite communities and start taking part in conversations. A: He starts out with "I once heard Tony Stewart say" Why do DJs make terrible drivers? Saimonas is a list curator at Bored Panda with BA in Multimedia. They travel to Mexico and begin to set up in the square. 19. The priest replied, "No.I think I'll just wait for the police." They take the carb-orator off. Was the cord too long?" Kyle knocks him down AGAIN, and says, "That was a judo chop from Japan." What kind of cars do people in Norway drive?Fjords. I just got nine out of 10 on my drivers test. Bobby Labonte is in the Hospital! 38. New comments cannot be posted and votes cannot be cast. Good news: After the wreck, your Audi is finally an innie. ", As soon as the vehicle rolled into the pitstop, the jack said? The first black NASCAR driver Turns out he was just telling me he approved of my driving. "Left turn professional". Go over there and tell him to use a sponge instead.. To which he replied, "Well, ma'am I have spent my whole life on the track, testing chassis, testing engines,testing tires, winning races and I even won the NASCAR Sprint Cup." This understandably shook up the other two, and so they both jumped when the second door openedand they saw an even MORE disgusting example of automaking gone wrong. Bobby falls again and bounces back up. How do motor sporting fans impersonate race cars? It was multi-colored with plenty of rust and primerdirty interior..and you could smell it even over the Brimstone. How do drivers eat healthily? Dad jokes exist for numerous topics, including autosports, and here are some of the most cringe-worthy race car one-liners. What is the main difference between BMWs and Porcupines? 7/16/2020 7:06 AM PT. Top Nav. Illegal drag racing or street racing can become as dangerous or even more dangerous than a Nascar pileup. Lamborghini once decided to ditch the ICE entirely and focus on electric cars for foreseeable futureThat time period was known as Silence of the Lambs. Why couldnt the frog find where he parked his car? 2.Girls leaving club. What professional sport would be more fun to watch if the athletes drank alcohol during? They are trained to look for red flags. Apparently NASCAR fans didnt want to mix the races. The Most Awesome Race Car Toys And Tracks For The Kid Obsessed With Racing. Christ said "I do not speak of my own Accord". Q: Do race drivers stop and take a nap? The front row at a NASCAR race. This article was originally published on Dec. 6, 2019, A Mom's Hilarious Review Of Her Dad Watching Her Son Is Going Viral, A Man Went Viral For Refusing To Give Up His Spot On A Ride To A Crying Child. Knock, knock! What does a Volkswagen run on?Beetle juice. A good vehicle will get wrecked, and a bad vehicle will finish the race. What did the ace car say to the letter R? I like the people who call soccer is gay because I always comment So you call soccer gay, but love watching a sport where a bunch of sweaty dudes grope each other for balls. screams the cop. Because they are on a short circuit. /*# sourceMappingURL=https://www.redditstatic.com/desktop2x/chunkCSS/IdCard.ea0ac1df4e6491a16d39_.css.map*/._2JU2WQDzn5pAlpxqChbxr7{height:16px;margin-right:8px;width:16px}._3E45je-29yDjfFqFcLCXyH{margin-top:16px}._13YtS_rCnVZG1ns2xaCalg{font-family:Noto Sans,Arial,sans-serif;font-size:14px;font-weight:400;line-height:18px;display:-ms-flexbox;display:flex}._1m5fPZN4q3vKVg9SgU43u2{margin-top:12px}._17A-IdW3j1_fI_pN-8tMV-{display:inline-block;margin-bottom:8px;margin-right:5px}._5MIPBF8A9vXwwXFumpGqY{border-radius:20px;font-size:12px;font-weight:500;letter-spacing:0;line-height:16px;padding:3px 10px;text-transform:none}._5MIPBF8A9vXwwXFumpGqY:focus{outline:unset} "What a joke he is." A funny thing happened between NASCAR's Riverside-related panic and its proposed start date for the Left-Right series: not only did the California road course get a Why didn't the two Alfa Romeo owners say hi to each other when they met at the bar?Because they saw each other at the mechanic's earlier that day. Just imagine how unfair it would be for a horse in NASCAR. What is a lacrosse players favorite type of car? Autosports. 3. ._1sDtEhccxFpHDn2RUhxmSq{font-family:Noto Sans,Arial,sans-serif;font-size:14px;font-weight:400;line-height:18px;display:-ms-flexbox;display:flex;-ms-flex-flow:row nowrap;flex-flow:row nowrap}._1d4NeAxWOiy0JPz7aXRI64{color:var(--newCommunityTheme-metaText)}.icon._3tMM22A0evCEmrIk-8z4zO{margin:-2px 8px 0 0} 6. Have a look at the top 10 funniest race car jokes for fans. Psst, also check out our list of the best car movies! What do you call the world's most badass sedan?A Liam Nissan. A: A Good Start. Get the best of Bored Panda in your inbox. What did the computer say to the other person after a 16 hour car ride?Damn, that was a hard drive. In nascar they wear their sponsors on their shirts. A: Banging On The Lid Of The Casket Trying To Get Out, 34. Q: What Does Brittany Spears And Dale Earnhardt Jr Have In Common? one advertises there sponspors and the other keeps it hidden! Whats the difference between Hitler and a Nascar driver? A: On a porcupine, the pricks are on the outside! 3.My business. 4.Left NASCAR. 4 car, is celebrating dad jokes like never before. NASCAR wants to control the sport I say let the How can you tell if a car is from Switzerland? So, if you are into the roaring, rumbling, scraping, or screeching, someone who can't pipe down when it comes to autos, or just someone who doesn't mind a funny joke about cars, you are in for a greasy treat. By doing so it creates people with an unfair advantage when it comes to competition. After considering the remainder of the immediate family and learning that domestic violence was apparently a way of life among them, the judge took the unprecedented step of allowing the boy to propose who should have custody of him. Q: What Does Brittany Spears And Dale Earnhardt Jr Have In Common? SERIES NEWS. What type of snakes are found on cars?Windshield Vipers! ._1QwShihKKlyRXyQSlqYaWW{height:16px;width:16px;vertical-align:bottom}._2X6EB3ZhEeXCh1eIVA64XM{margin-left:3px}._1jNPl3YUk6zbpLWdjaJT1r{font-size:12px;font-weight:500;line-height:16px;border-radius:2px;display:inline-block;margin-right:5px;overflow:hidden;text-overflow:ellipsis;vertical-align:text-bottom;white-space:pre;word-break:normal;padding:0 4px}._1jNPl3YUk6zbpLWdjaJT1r._39BEcWjOlYi1QGcJil6-yl{padding:0}._2hSecp_zkPm_s5ddV2htoj{font-size:12px;font-weight:500;line-height:16px;border-radius:2px;display:inline-block;margin-right:5px;overflow:hidden;text-overflow:ellipsis;vertical-align:text-bottom;white-space:pre;word-break:normal;margin-left:0;padding:0 4px}._2hSecp_zkPm_s5ddV2htoj._39BEcWjOlYi1QGcJil6-yl{padding:0}._1wzhGvvafQFOWAyA157okr{font-size:12px;font-weight:500;line-height:16px;border-radius:2px;margin-right:5px;overflow:hidden;text-overflow:ellipsis;vertical-align:text-bottom;white-space:pre;word-break:normal;box-sizing:border-box;line-height:14px;padding:0 4px}._3BPVpMSn5b1vb1yTQuqCRH,._1wzhGvvafQFOWAyA157okr{display:inline-block;height:16px}._3BPVpMSn5b1vb1yTQuqCRH{background-color:var(--newRedditTheme-body);border-radius:50%;margin-left:5px;text-align:center;width:16px}._2cvySYWkqJfynvXFOpNc5L{height:10px;width:10px}.aJrgrewN9C8x1Fusdx4hh{padding:2px 8px}._1wj6zoMi6hRP5YhJ8nXWXE{font-size:14px;padding:7px 12px}._2VqfzH0dZ9dIl3XWNxs42y{border-radius:20px}._2VqfzH0dZ9dIl3XWNxs42y:hover{opacity:.85}._2VqfzH0dZ9dIl3XWNxs42y:active{transform:scale(.95)} Fight boredom with iPhones and iPads here. Q: What Does Dale Earnhardt And Pink Floyd Have In Common? Q: If Robert Pressley, John Andretti and Geoff Bodine were in a boat and the Boat Sinks, Who Would be saved? 20. It reminds him that he never got to finish a race. Whats the difference between NASCAR and the NBA? Neeeeoooww! 2023 BDG Media, Inc. All rights reserved. "Oh, yes," he answers. RELATED: 100+ Football Jokes That Will Score You A Touchdown With Friends. A: Caution Flag Yellow DASHBOARD. Web114 Funny Car Jokes To Accelerate Your Day. WebBemorepanda collected some funny memes about NASCAR. Here's another miracle. They drove up to the farm, Kyle got out and knocked on the front door and was let in. Jeff asked, "Aren't you going to have any?" Jimmie Johnson was just sitting in the Drivers Lounge chatting with Dale Earnhardt Jr, drinking his Diet Mountain Dew and minding his own business when all of a sudden Kyle Busch comes in and WHACK!! Apparently he hasn't passed anything for almost 2 years! The Priest agrees completely, so Matt opened the bottle took 3 big drinks and then handed the bottle to the priest. Bobby jumps and bounces at the end of the cord, but when he comes back up, the Jeff notices that he has a few cuts and scratches.