Sterling (1988). They're so awful, they're really funny. The most terrifying words in the English language are: I'm from the government and I'm here to help. Ain't it funny how they prosper while the country Politics The Hill Quotes Follow AzQuotes on Facebook, Twitter and Google+. You can easily and freely share it with your friends and family members. Aug 15, 2021 - Explore Puran Saud's board "Politicians funny" on Pinterest. He kept it up until a hunter came along and shot him. Marion Barry on Crime in Washington, D.C. Rod Blagojevich on Selling Obama's Senate Seat, George W. Bush to His FEMA Director: "You're Doing A Heck of a Job", James Stockdale in the Vice Presidential Debate, Bill Clinton on His Affair with Monica Lewinsky, Monica Lewinsky on Her Affair With Bill Clinton, Martin Van Buren on Traveling by Railroad, 35 Best Late-Night Jokes About Hillary Clinton, Top 15 Dumbest Quotes About the Gulf Oil Spill. Free Standard Shipping On Orders Over $99. And the more grave or important things are You know, some comedians can get this disease where they get serious all the time. John Kerry, on voting against a military funding bill for U.S. troops in Iraq, March 19, 2004, 'I love California, I practically grew up in Phoenix. Discover and share Funny Quotes About Politicians. If you can't convince them, confuse them. Politicians and diapers should be changed frequently and all for the same reason. **Genie:** What is your first wish? I love Mikhail Bulgakov. Bonaparte's words carry a wealth of wisdom when he says that irrationality is a welcome quality in politics. It seems hot to you, but it never does to anyone else. F**k him. It is big enough to take care of itself. Funny political quotes Great political jokes . It can be a funny solution. American writer Henry David Thoreau opines that no country can be completely free and unshackled unless it accepts that the individual is supreme. Votes: 1, We have never been strictly political, only strictly funny. All designs available in various styles, sizes, & colors. All three go with a White House official to examine the fence. ''', Illinois Gov. And politics can be real important and all that. As I was telling President Bush. This guy is, I believe, a racist. - Watch The Politician Online Genre: Comedy: Number Of Seasons: 1: . The Blair Decade 1997-2007: A Miscellany of Political Facts the Rows, the Scandals, the Funny Quotes, the Main Events Under New Labour. You can read out the whole article to know about it. We've had some sexuhsetbacks. Pat Paulsen. '', Sen. And we are blessed. If you want another color or a different style, you can visit Mazeshirt. People are taking their comedians seriously and the politicians as a joke. '', ''Too many good docs are getting out of the business. The conduct of public affairs for private advantage. '', President Gerald Ford, in a 1976 presidential debate with Jimmy Carter, Adm. It is fun in watching the debates of politicians. This is Joementum here in New Hampshire. Theodore Roosevelt, www.facebook.com/Po/itica/CorrectnessGone Wild. When you visit the site, Dotdash Meredith and its partners may store or retrieve information on your browser, mostly in the form of cookies. Fool me you can't get fooled again. Not that there's a moral obligation for a comic to fix things, but I like to see a comic that's upset about something and offer a solution. Below we have the top quotes as they were voted on by the visitors of witty-quotes.com. And if the rest of the country had followed our lead, we wouldn't have had all these problems over the years, either. Michael Kinsley Any politician promising not to raise your taxes is like a vampire promising to become a vegetarian. Forgive your enemies, but never forget their names. ASIN : B091F324G8. Mark Sanford regarding Sanford's disappearance in June of 2009, when he was visiting his mistress in Argentina, ''Our enemies are innovative and resourceful, and so are we. politics quotes marx groucho political quote looking trouble famous sayings slogans most finding democracy everywhere honest history quotations would azquotes. Yes, we do defend our office as we do defend our homes. But it brought language, ideas. . All designs available in various styles, sizes, & colors. - Robert Byrne. His own illustrious career, as a politician and a president, is testimonial to this. 07, 2022 America is a great country, but as far as put-downs go, we can learn a thing or two from our. The more pointless something is, the funnier it is, you know? The only reason they get mad at the Black Panther Party when you do it is for the simple reason that we're political. One of the greatest military leaders of the world, Napoleon Bonaparte was a master strategist and a consummate politician. '', Sen. Their opinions carry a wealth of wisdom. . First he'll have to navigate the most treacherous political landscape: high school. I want you to know that also I will not make age an issue of this campaign. '', ''What a waste it is to lose one's mind. These quote lists include all types of sayings, including inspirational quotes, short quotes, funny quotes, and wisdom quotes. List 11 wise famous quotes about Politics The Hill: We got a lot of politicians up there on Capital Hill. Mark Twain 1 Politics, noun. I didn't realise political writing could be so funny. "As between God, country and apple pie, politicians have done the least harm in the name of apple pie." - Robert Brault "An honest man in politics shines more there than he would elsewhere." - Mark Twain "Statesmen tell you what is true even though it may be unpopular. James Freeman Clarke statesmanship I desire only to be known as the Demi Moore of Philippine politics." Santiago's response to questions on her presidential run. Everything is changing. '', "What I'm hearing which is sort of scary is that they all want to stay in Texas. Votes: 1, It took forever for me to get work because I was a political comic, and now it's become good business, and God knows how long that'll last. : TOP 25 AVARICE GREED QUOTES | A-Z Quotes, Socrates Quotes About Politics. Too many people spend money they haven't earned, to buy things they don't want . Joe Wilson's (R-SC) shouted retort to Obama's address before a joint session of Congress on Sept. 9, 2009, ''I'm just not giving it up for f***in' nothing. He believed in the power of the people, in the truest sense. In Mexico, an air conditioner is called a politician because it makes a lot of noise but doesnt work very well. Politics is the only art whose artists regularly disown their masterpieces. Cookies collect information about your preferences and your devices and are used to make the site work as you expect it to, to understand how you interact with the site, and to show advertisements that are targeted to your interests. Quoted in Irving Stone, Clarence Darrow for the Defense (1941), Quoted in Clement Attlee, A Prime Minister Remembers (1961) See Briand 2; Clemenceau 4, Edward Abbey (2015). People of my generation in Portugal fell into the magic potion of political ideas. '', National Security Adviser Condoleezza Rice, who is unmarried, overheard making a slip of the tongue at a Washington dinner party, April 2004, ''The internet is not something you just dump something on. And, and I can always use it. But it brought language, ideas. ), praising the career of onetime segregationist Strom Thurmond in 2002, ''Can I explain to you what happened? 1. - I may be drunk, Miss, but in the morning I will be sober, and you will still be ugly. '', Defense Secretary Donald Rumsfeld, Defense Department briefing, Feb. 12, 2002, ''My belief is we will, in fact, be greeted as liberators. Sometimes I wonder whether the world is being run by smart people who are putting us on, or by imbeciles who really mean it. Funny Political Jokesfrom Famous People Jokes About Other Politicians Funny Political One-Liners Best Short Politician Jokes George Bush Jokes Tory or Labour? '', Richard Nixon, in a 1977 interview with David Frost, ''I triple guarantee you. - Clarence Darrow 3. '', ''I believe we are on an irreversible trend toward more freedom and democracy but that could change. '', Secretary of State Colin Powell, addressing the United Nations on Iraqi weapons of mass destruction in 2003, ''Brownie, you're doing a heck of a job. "It is as hard and severe a thing to be a true politician as to be truly moral." Albert Einstein Famous scientist Albert Einstein urges citizens to be involved in politics. I'm beginning to believe it. It's just right over the border. I don't make jokes. A patriot must always be ready to defend his country against his government. Political satire is a serious thing. Groucho Marx Art, Freedom, Political Will 194 Copy quote Everything is changing. I still find myself on 'Piers Morgan' or on some show and I think, 'I hope this is funny.' It's a series of tubes. Former Republican Attorney General, Jeff Sessions, has perhaps the most hilarious marijuana quote of any politician. You can find out more about our use, change your default settings, and withdraw your consent at any time with effect for the future by visiting Cookies Settings, which can also be found in the footer of the site. By Ian Hernon. You're right phonetically, but what else? Political Quotes Funny and Memorable Bill Clinton Quotes. I still find myself on 'Piers Morgan' or on some show and I think, 'I hope this is funny.'. '', ''When the President does it, that means it's not illegal. Reader, suppose you were an idiot. You have to do it night after night after night to kind of make it. Votes: 1, I don't really have funny things to say about politics. Politics is the gentle art of getting votes from the poor and campaign funds from the rich, by promising to protect each the other. That's the problem." - George Carlin "You can lead a man to Congress, but you can't make him think." - Milton Berle If ignorance goes to forty dollars a barrel, I want drilling rights to George Bushs head. '', President Jimmy Carter, in an interview with 'Playboy' one month prior to the 1976 election, ''In case anyone's wondering out there, yes, they're both available Only kidding. These words by conservative Prussian Otto Von Bismarck mean that politics can make anything happen. . See more ideas about politicians funny, political quotes, sharing quotes. I was pleasantly surprised how funny politician jokes could be. Everything is so weird in politics that it's very hard to be funny about it, I think. . Everybody is so overwhelmed by the hospitality. Votes: 1 Hanya Yanagihara Compared to politics, I think sports is funnier, because it's inconsequential. Funniest Political Quotes in the history of politics 1. And to have the ability afterwards to explain why it didn't happen. I am not worried about the deficit. When we open a ''revolutionary'' review, or read a ''revolutionary'' speech, we yawn our heads off. Politicians talk in generalities and lies, and I think they've caused all our grief. '', ''I think that gay marriage should be between a man and a woman. The President has kept all the promises he intended to keep. In 2016 he said, with a straight face, that " Good people don't smoke marijuana ." Perhaps he didn't realize just how many people have smoked weed (or he didn't care). Writing is like sex. American author and journalist Tom Wolfe expresses that there are no true liberals in this world. Trent Lott (R-Miss. '', Rep. '', ''Blessed are the young, for they shall inherit the national debt. God knows I will do this and forgives me. I mean, that is fantastic that you're doing that. political organized member rogers am quotes memes meme any. The Dead Kennedys are political, but they are more funny than they are political. My fake plants died because I did not pretend to water them. The problem with political jokes is they get elected. Fast shipping, Satisfaction Guaranteed! Votes: 1, Frankly, most of my friends hold very different political beliefs. You'd go to the fish market, and all the women who were selling fish would call each other fascist, communist. Recovery Quotes Funny Quotes Romantic Quotes For Her Anxiety Quotes . They promise to build bridges even when there are no rivers. Sponsored. Harry S. Truman, Steve Neal (2003). "A promising young man should go into politics so that he can go on promising for the rest of his life.". And politics can be real important and all that. - Bob Inglis 2. The more pointless something is, the funnier it is, you know? L AM NOT A MEMBER OF ANY ORGANIZED POLITICAL PARTY IAM ADEMOGRAT WILL me.me. American Senator Eugene McCarthy says it with a straight face. And suppose you were a member of Congress. '', Former Senator and presidential candidate Gary Hart, on his encounter with Donna Rice, ''You cannot be president of the United States if you don't have faith. All these quotes are given below. Unfortunately, most of them do not keep those promises. Every politician has a promising career. 6. One of the penalties for refusing to participate in politics is that you end up being governed by your inferiors. Overview. What's politically correct a lot of times is not funny. Parliament of Whores: A Lone Humorist Attempts to Explain the Entire U.S. Government, p.24, Grove/Atlantic, Inc. Funny military intelligence quotes. ''Give this motherf****r Obama his senator? Will Rogers Funny, Life, Change 98 Copy quote Show source **Genie:** You now have a million dollars and all the worlds politician now receive two million. Votes: 1, I think the problems with comedians that are political, and there are some brilliant ones, are the ones that offer no solutions. But we all lived in this century. That's a good-looking mummy. . It's something you have to find for yourself. Being president is like running a cemetery: youve got a lot of people under you and nobodys listening. upvote downvote report. '', ''I heard there's rumors on the Internets that we're going to have a draft. If you put the federal government in charge of the Sahara Desert, in 5 years there'd be a shortage of sand. Find the most bizarre quotations, wittiest one-liners, and funniest gaffes from career politicians and the newly-elected alike. '', Sen. Shop Semi Fascist Funny Political Humor Biden Quotes Kids Hoodies at TeeShirtPalace. We have never been strictly political, only strictly funny. What acontrast between their soporific speeches and these witty one-liners. Ronald Reagan ________________________________ Sick of politics quotes Politicians are the same all over. Semi-Fascist Funny Political Humor Biden Quotes T-Shirt - Semi Fascist Funny Political Humor Biden Quotes shirt. Too many OB-GYNs aren't able to practice their love with women all across this country. "Political success is the ability, when the inevitable occurs, to get credit for it.". This inevitably kills them but they get their revenge by passing onto others the corpse of power. Meme Center www.memecenter.com. I never told anybody to lie, not a single time; never. I never saw anything funnier than Texas politics. "Politics is more difficult than physics." Mao Tse-Tung If you want a friend in Washington, buy a dog. But there are also unknown unknowns the ones we don't know we don't know. If you want to know more or withdraw your consent to all or some of the cookies, please refer to the. '', ''As yesterday's positive report card shows, childrens do learn when standards are high and results are measured. On hearing this the politician takes out his phone and talks into it. '', Sen. Joseph Lieberman to Wolf Blitzer, on his momentum leading up to the New Hampshire Primary, where he characterized his fifth place finish as a ''three-way split decision for third place'', ''I am not worried about the deficit. quotesgram. High-quality Funny Politicians Quotes jigsaw puzzles designed and sold by independent artists. British politics, as the world knows, is a joke. Instead, they contain a political message, and the artist takes full responsibility. It took forever for me to get work because I was a political comic, and now it's become good business, and God knows how long that'll last. She said this to the "International Press Association" members during a speech in The Hague. It's ridiculous. I've earned everything I've got. . English playwright William Shakespeare tells us that a politician would always try to avoid God, as the politician is not truthful. The Dead Kennedys. American philosopher and historian Will Durant was well known for The History of Civilization. Bush, speaking to employees of an insurance company during the 1992 New Hampshire primary, ''It may be tempting and more comfortable to just keep your head down, plod along, and appease those who demand: 'Sit down and shut up,' but that's the worthless, easy path; that's a quitter's way out. As of now, I am in control here in the White House. '', ''My fear is that the whole island will become so overly populated that it will tip over and capsize. You'd be surprised. '', Vice President Dick Cheney to Sen. Patrick Leahy, during an angry exchange on the Senate floor about profiteering by Halliburton, June 22, 2004, ''Republicans understand the importance of bondage between a mother and child. It's ridiculous. Wyndham Lewis Revolutionary politics, revolutionary art, and oh, the revolutionary mind, is the dullest thing on earth. I'm not joking. Fast shipping, Satisfaction Guaranteed! Everything is changing. '', Bill Clinton, on ''Juanita,'' a newly discovered Incan mummy on display at the National Geographic museum, ''You know, education if you make the most of it you study hard, you do your homework and you make an effort to be smart, you can do well. He can compress the most words into the smallest ideas better than any man I ever met. New Funny Pictures: Most Important Philosophical Quotations.. 11 Pics about New Funny Pictures: Most Important Philosophical Quotations. '', House Speaker Nancy Pelosi talking about President Obama's healthcare law, ''We know there are known knowns: there are things we know we know. The question about who God is is a very public question. These are not assertions. On Humility. Her clever use of irony express the shrewdness of a politician who can use anyone for the benefit of one's country. I mean in this century's history. '', CIA Director George Tenet, reassuring President George W. Bush in 2002 on the case for weapons of mass destruction in Iraq, ''These broads are millionaires, lionized on TV and in articles about them, reveling in their status as celebrities and stalked by griefparrazies. A politician is a person with whose politics you don't agree. , . Choose from 30-piece, 110-piece, 252-piece, 500-piece, and 1000-piece puzzles. ? . Message: I care. I am not going to exploit, for political purposes, my opponents youth and inexperience. So don't feel sorry for -- don't cry for me, Argentina. 29. He has been widely cited as a political humor expert and authored two books on the subject. A lot of people who claim they're political comedians are just comedians who have opinions. One is from Chicago, another is from Tennessee, and the third is from Minnesota. The Dead Kennedys are political, but they are more funny than they are political. '', a spokesman for South Carolina Gov. Votes: 1, Everything is so weird in politics that it's very hard to be funny about it, I think. He gathers a group of villagers and ask what problems they face. I wish I did, but I don't. '', Former First Lady Barbara Bush, on the Hurricane Katrina evacuees at the Astrodome in Houston, Sept. 5, 2005, ''The attractive lady whom I had only recently been introduced to dropped into my lap.I chose not to dump her off. But he also concedes that politics is more complex than science. Politicians Quotes - BrainyQuote Politics is too serious a matter to be left to the politicians. When I was a boy I was told that anybody could become President. The conduct of public affairs for private advantage. Politics, noun. Votes: 1, Politicians talk in generalities and lies, and I think they've caused all our grief. Votes: 1, British politics, as the world knows, is a joke. Pero, ok 'yan." Jos Maria de Ea de Queiroz funny The short memories of the American voters is what keeps our politicians in office. His words belie a sense of disdain for politicians who seem like amateurs. Mar 1, 2020 - Explore Rickio's board "Politicians MeMes", followed by 3,483 people on Pinterest.

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